I AM

Cast: Anurag Kashyap, Sanjay Suri, Radhika Apte, Shernaz Patel, Pooja Gandhi, Rahul Bose, Arjun Mathur, Abhimanyu Shekhar Singh, Kalki Koechlin, Juhi Chawla, Manisha Koirala

Director: Onir

'I Am' has travelled in film festivals for last many months and rightly so since at the core of it this movie has a shelf life beyond the theatrical release. Yes, it has seen a mainstream release for itself but then it is made strictly for the niche audience which can digest films that don't quite lend a comfortable outing and instead make you think along as the drama unfolds. The fact that the man at the hot seat, Onir, has kept the sensibility and the sensitivity of the narrative intact only makes 'I Am' a must watch for those looking at quality cinema that dares to tell different tales. What strikes most about 'I Am' is that it carries a rich and polished look to it which is especially commendable since by no means is it a conventional commercial entertainer that are generally known to have a dependency on strong production values. Most of the scenes are filmed outdoors in locations across Kolkata, Kashmir, Bangalore and Mumbai which adds on to the visual appeal.

The beauty of 'I Am' lies in the fact that majority of the four stories in the narrative aren't stretched beyond the point. The best of the lot is the final story, the one involving Rahul Bose and Arjun Mathur, which begins as a love story of two men. There is a chuckle here or there and also a full-on shock appeal for the mainstream audience once the two share a lip lock. However it is all forgotten once Abhimanyu Singh (the cop) comes into picture. The sequence is truly shocking. On the other hand despite it's serious theme, the story involving Nandita Das and Purab Kohli brings a smile on the face for most of it's 30 minutes duration. Purab's discomfort, the nurse asking him about the 'three days fast', his subsequent crush on Nandita - all of it does keep the proceedings light hearted. The ending is just apt too and non-flimy.

The story which is not as high-impact though is the one featuring Juhi Chawla and Manisha Koirala. Both actresses seem to be bogged down by the 'comeback bit' and it is perhaps due to the limited space (30 minutes) available to them which doesn't allow a rise in the character graph. The theme of both Hindus and Muslims losing their own share of happiness due to militancy in Kashmir is well intentioned but the result is neither hard hitting nor heart rendering. The story featuring Sanjay Suri and Anurag Kashyap has it's moments of scary silences but thankfully Onir keeps the element of paedophilic overtures limited which doesn't make one overtly uncomfortable with what happens on screen. Of course at numerous junctures you are reminded of 'The Great Indian Butterfly' which was again about a youngster being confused about his sexuality. However the twist in the tale which is that of the boy here being a party to the proceedings does make the story different from many other child-abuse stories. Music is just apt as well with each of the songs making a good impression as they play in the background. Performances by majority of actors is top notch with Nandita Das, Sanjay Suri, Rahul Bose and Abhimanyu Singh sharing the top honours.

Let's face it though, 'I Am' is not for that segment of audience that frequents theaters with a family to watch the likes of a 'Dabangg' or a 'Yamla Pagla Deewana' or a 'Band Baaja Baaraat'. This means that the feel-good factor is definitely out of question here as the film not just throws in some shocking visuals but also makes you constantly ponder over what would happen next and then also think about it long after the end credits start rolling.“Kaafi garmi hai (It’s quite hot),” is a young college kid’s (Purab Kohli) lame opener. The woman sitting next to him understands the boy’s discomfort at making a conversation. “You don't have to talk, if you don't want to,” she, Afia (Nandita Das), tells him. It is a weird situation. The two are at the lobby of a fertility clinic. The boy’s a sperm donor -- the woman, the recipient. As per rules, they were never supposed to meet. But she was adamant. Through flashbacks, we figure how this single woman, once married to a cheater cock, got to where she is.

I Am, strictly speaking, is not a feature film. It’s a bunch of four entirely unrelated short films. Given lowered attention spans among audiences in general, this may well be how movies could be watched in the future. I’m of course making this sweeping prediction in the same vein VS Naipaul had once famously prophesied the demise of the novel. Afia has a buddy called Megha (Juhi Chawla), which is the loose connection for her story that follows. These casual links justify all shorts within this common package.

Megha, a displaced Hindu pandit, goes back to Kashmir to sign away her ancestral property on a dotted line finally undo her ties with the heaven on earth she once called home. Hers is a sensitive conflict. She meets the current Muslim occupants, ones who were once her friends and neighbours. They’re now set apart by terrorism and a curse called organised religion. Manisha Koirala plays Megha’s Kashmiri childhood friend. It’s been a while since we saw Koirala on screen. It’s still not hard to tell how Mani Ratnam saw a suicide bomber (Dil Se) in those intensely feminine looks. As the two separated friends spend time together, it becomes unclear whose life is better now: whether the Hindu woman found actual freedom, because she was forced to leave Kashmir. Did those who she left behind find only potholes in a place they once considered paradise. You are made to think, therefore, I guess, I Am. Which is a good thing. Two films down. Two more to go. Through each of the shorts set in four different cities, you sense as well the sights and sounds of Kolkata, Kashmir, Bengaluru and Mumbai that make for a changing Indian landscape.

The third pic is a pretty predictable account of a man (Sanjay Suri) who was sodomised by his uncle (Anurag Kashyap) while growing up. The victim somehow used that to his selfish advantage. This is almost in the same way, the final film, starring the incredibly uninhibited Rahul Bose unusual for Indian leading men shows how the marginalised homosexual community in the country, living under an antiquated law (now repealed), are abused, harassed for all sorts of personal gains. Clearly, the director’s picked up strongly engaging conflicts. It should also be as noted achievement for online social networks that, along with professional producers, the filmmaker found 400 unknown investors from across 45 cities of the world to back this vision.

Given that you do end up with four movies, instead of one, it’s only fair that one points out their personal favourite. Mine will have to be the first: a recipient who meets her sperm donor. It’s short-lived. A few steps ahead and this could have been a story with very world-class, Pedro Almodovar (Talk To Her, All About My Mother) sort of sensibilities. For now this would do.How and where does one begin to describe the infinite satisfaction of watching a film that emerges from the closet with some arresting and disturbing home-truths on what goes on when the lights are off? Tiptoeing through the darkest corridors of the human heart, director Onir in "I AM" comes up with four stories on the question of individual, sexual and geo-political identity.

There are no happy beginnings or endings for any of the four protagonists in "I AM". Each one creates a universe of sublime sorrow spearheaded by an inability to well, fit in. Squares among circles? So be it. Onir revels in creating damaged but empathetic worlds for his four heroes. No, these are super-heroes in their resilience and determination to tackle discrimination without succumbing to their internal injuries. then Afia in the first story, played by the Nandita Das, asks her buddy Juhi Chawla if she'd lend her brother for some serious sperm banking, Juhi, who we get to know in the next story is Megha reclaiming her heritage in Jammu and Kashmir, walks away in disgust. We can't. We don't want to.

Artificial insemination gets a cinematic treatment in the story as Nandita meets her sperm donor (Purab Kohli in a timid mode). As they speak gently into the night, a warm fertile relationship grows between them in the fertility clinic. No they don't fall in love. Where is the space for that to creep in? The punctuations in the first story are bolder, more aggressive than the other three, as though Onir wanted to get all the 'cinema' in his film out of the way as early as possible. For the second story "I Am Megha", Onir takes his compelling drama of the damned to Jammu and Kashmir. The location is treacherously pretty. The dreaded M-word stalks the streets with unrelenting impunity. Here under the shadow of militancy, two dignified women, one a Kashmiri Pundit (Juhi) and the other a local Muslim (Manisha Koirala), interact with restrained annoyance. They are upset and angry. But they won't colour the ambience with their prejudices.

Thanks to Juhi and Manisha, who play out the Ingmar Bergmanesque drama in the deceptive tranquility of the valley, "I Am Megha" comes to life as a chamber-piece set in the outdoors. The third story "I Am Abhimanyu" on child abuse is understandably a portrait of acute complexities brought to a virile fruition by the director's determined evasion of any self-pity in the abused child's character. Rather, Abhimanyu (Sanjay Suri) grows up as quite a manipulator, not sure of his sexual preferences but sure that he'd milk the ambivalence of his tortured past for all that it's worth. Amazingly Onir goes through the three phases in Abhimanyu's life, as the abused child going on to a manipulative adolescent and thence to whining adulthood, in just about 15-20 minutes of playing-time. Portable epic, indeed!

This story also has the most intriguing array of actors, from Suri to Zain Salam as the adolescent Abhimanyu to Anurag Kashyap as the sexual molestor, to Shernaz Patel as the mother in denial and Radhika Apte as Suri's bohemian sounding-board who knows she may not be able to have sex with the man she so openly loves because of his tortured past. The sexual candour of this episode makes for remarkable viewing. Onir desists from making any judgement on those who scar the wounded.

The rawest, most guttural and devastating story is saved for the last. "I Am Omar" is a story straight out of every gay person's favourite nightmare. While making out in a car with his newly-acquired partner Omar (Arjun Mathur), Jai (Rahul Bose) is accosted by a vulgar homophobic cop. Abhimanyu Singh as the cop on the bawdy beat comes up with the most bludgeoning performance in the film. His filthy language and his even filthier intentions towards the cowering gay man are brought out by the actor with a ferocity and clarity that provide an entirely new definition to credible characterization. This story is shot with the quivering conviction of a crime reporter with a video camera who has suddenly chanced on a scene of atrocity that far exceeds his call of duty. The enormity of the crime is represented in the beads of sweat that appear on the brow of the victim of the police atrocity. Rahul is full of righteous damnation.

"I Am" can happen to anyone who doesn't conform. The isolation of the unorthodox is palpable in every precious breath that the four-storeyed tale takes. The quartet of stories is backed by the most wonderful team of actors and technicians. These are not "happy" stories. How can they be when the people in them are so intrinsically unhappy? The challenge for Onir is to make his tortured characters acclimatized to their pain and suffering without making them look like resigned victims. Though all four stories are shot by one cameraman Arvind Kannabiran, each one conveys its own mood, texture and urgency. Though all are joined at the hip, each story has its own unique rhythm. There are no empty symbolic gestures of reconciliation in this world of disaffected derelicts. Each protagonist carries his burden of guilty and grief to the last. There is no getting away from the despair. But there is no sense of pessimism in the telling of the stories. That's the beauty of this little gem of a film. You get affected. But you don't lose hope. At the end of the tunnel there is a beam of light. You can't miss it.